Guilty Pleasures.

Guilty pleasure is a commonly used term in our society today. I have guilty pleasures, you probably have guilty pleasures, but have we ever really questioned the origin of our guilt? In this blog post, I'm going to take an everyday guilty pleasure of mine, examine what I feel guilty about and ask the crucial question of why. 

My most recently formed guilty pleasure would have to be "Gossip Girl", the rather popular TV series about the lives (and endless gossip) of New York's elite. 

So what is it about the show which causes me to feel slightly embarrassed and a need to justify my watching of it whenever I mention it to other people?

Its probably because the plot is hardly particularly intellectual. When you analyse and attempt to sum up what its all about you realise its just a lot of very attractive people in beautifully made clothing cruising through the upper east side with so much money that college degrees are just *quote* "accessories".

It represents and glamorises a lot of things that I disagree with. For example, as mentioned above, all of the main characters are filthy rich, practically wear a different outfit in every shot and this lifestyle is made to look super cool and luxurious. You fall in love with characters whose behaviour you really shouldn't grow fond of (I am completely obsessed with a character who attempted rape twice in the series and a girl who is the pillar of mean insecurity and manipulates and verbally abuses practically everybody.) The cherry on top is that the one voice of opposition to this plastic and fake world is made look like a crazily over the top, opinionated lunatic! 

Therefore, due to its vanity, shallowness and severely differing morals, I've put it in the "that's kind of embarrassing" box. But why? Well, I guess its pretty simple when you look at it head on, we seem to care about what other people think of us, our reputation and what we're known for. I'm certain we all have priority characteristics programmed into our heads from life which are the backbone to undergoing and justifying all of our decisions, actions and beliefs. Now what do I mean by that? Well, let's say if someone really took pride in being a realistic person, ( or it could be cool, nice, truthful, courageous, positive anything) from people they've known, things they've seen and experiences they've had, they've unconsciously grown attached to the desire that anyone who describes them, names that adjective. And that is the main reason why, I feel, we have guilty pleasures. Furthermore, if we looked deeper into the reasons why, maybe its not just about our reputation and other people's thoughts on us but maybe we're half keeping it a secret from ourselves. Do we even fully admit to ourselves that we like this thing or do we just justify a reason for the obsession?

So what's your conclusion? Think of your own guilty pleasure in your life, what makes you guilty and why. Do you think we should feel guilty? I suppose it depends. If you're guilty pleasure proves harmful to other people should you still act on it because you want to? And where does the mind play in this? Guilty pleasures seem like a head vs heart debate to me but I don't think it has to be. While there's something kind of nice about a guilty pleasure and all that it entails, I suppose one has to look at their life and ask why they feel they can't be open about this thing they are attracted to and why they're attracted to it. What's missing in their life?
And lastly, I definitely don't think that just because your guilty pleasure may be regarded as stupid or shallow then that instantly means you are. Perhaps you are just curious about another side of life? Difference can be enthralling in itself.

Anyway enough with all the questions, get pondering and form your own conclusion!

Don't repress your feelings because they're there for a reason! Always deal with them mentally or physically!

                                                          Love,
                                                              Rachel! =)

Things to love about life!

                          

I thought this would be a good idea for a blog post, to act as a boost for us all to remember and smile about the simple, yet beautiful things life has to offer. These are a random list of things, feelings and moments which, when I dwell on them, make life worth living and bring me so much happiness.

You know we all think about the big purpose in life, me included, and for us who enjoy it, who says we should stop? However, one very important element to our own happiness is surely the little things, the often unexpected moments which never really pass on but stay with us to hopefully be repeated again and again...

• Cherry Blossoms.....in abundance, everywhere and anywhere.
• Really cold apple juice
• Hitting the pillow after a long, busy and productive day!
• Netflix... simple as... 
• That first bite of a chocolate bar, especially if you're hungry.
• Being called pretty or finding out someone likes you! 
• Finding the perfect temperature in the shower!
• Having a number of things on in one day, and also having absolutely nothing to do for an entire 24 hours...
• Gazing out the window in the morning to a beautiful, sunny day.
• Bouncing a tennis ball on a racket outside, and watching it soar into such an infinite sky with so many possibilities
• Being in an environment where you feel welcomed and wanted.
• Being so captivated, the time flies.
• Getting something done you've been putting off..

• CHRISTMAS!!!!!
• laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing...
• Replaying all the moments in your head where you were with that one person you like, thinking of all the little things they do
• Those times when your whole family are getting along
• Travelling
• Eating out.
• Being inspired, motivated and put in utter awe. 
• Having periods of time where you literally could not give a damn about what others think!
• Receiving kindness from another as well as giving it successfully and genuinely.
• Being inside when its raining 

• The perfect hot chocolate.
• Getting something you've wanted for ages 
• Thinking.
• Watching the elegance of snow falling
• The cinema
• Having really long, deep conversations
• Holding eye contact with someone
• Feeling like you've really helped someone.
• People listening to you, and caring!
• Keeping calm despite someone else's behaviour
• Hope.
• Reading or seeing something that stretches your mind
• SURPRISES
• Gorgeously warm baths...

• Teddy Bears!
• The beach... The sound of the Sea
• The feeling that you've impressed someone.
• SMILES, TRUE AND BEAMING SMILES
• Cake!
• Green Tea (and the peaceful feeling at the end of the mug)
• So- delicious- no -one- talks pizza
• Freezing water to a parched throat
• Being able to relate to something
• Our power to FORGIVE.
• Gratitude
• Technology
• Music
• Long car journeys

• Cuteness
• Art
• Freedom
• Nature
• Scents with memories
• Being completely alone to reconnect with yourself
• When someone has faith in you and doesn't give up
• Imagination
• Dreams
• Lemon Meringue Pie
• Dim rooms with elegant lights
• Being trusted
• Colours
• Hearing "God bless you" from an elderly person
• Accomplishing something
• Being addicted to a story
• Cloud watching

• Canopies
• That feeling that you're making a difference
• Feeling completely comfortable around someone else
• People getting your joke
• Receiving respect
• Having your mind blown
• An exciting text 
• Fast internet
• Songs with a killer beat
• Settling down to watch something or read a great book
• Learning a new skill
• Being greeted by your dog
• Feeling really cleansed
• That glimpse of good in even the most cruel seeming folk
• Winter
• An idea pops into your head
• That moment when everything is surreal
• Holidays abroad

Share some of your favourites from the list in the comments below or let us know what additional "little things" give a spark to your life!

                                                Love,

                                                                          Rachel! =)

Fake to be happy?

It recently came to my attention through observation of and discussion with other people, that a lot of folks seem to think that a person who is happy a large percentage of, or all of the time is fake! More people than you might expect almost look down on positivity and find it irritating to witness someone behaving in an "overly excited" manner.

And while we're on the subject, the same seems to apply for someone who's attitude towards others,
or beliefs are "boringly nice". People seem to prefer when one takes a negative outlook on life and kind of joins in complaining or going on about how bad their life is so that the other person doesn't feel so alone and can connect with someone.. through being negative.

 Its common for people who are down, being negative and not feeling good about themselves to dislike it when other people have taken a different route in life, have chosen to see the bright side because it makes them feel happy rather than the the pessimistic view to get a laugh or approval from others.

So what if its not cool to be happy or like and stand up for someone every one else is bitching about? What I always think of is, "why would I want to surround myself with someone who thinks frequent happiness, excitement or "niceness" is false? What good is them liking me (or more the satisfaction and consolation for spreading negativity) if I have to sacrifice my own happiness?"

" A lion doesn't concern himself with the opinion of sheep"

I know it can be hard to stand your ground when faced with a dominating character who almost forces this fog of negativity on you but as we grow and as we learn of the little importance other people's opinions on our attitude matters, I think we'll develop the ability to see through these people who say that happiness is fake and realise that a person's belief differing from yours does not equal being correct. Often times those with cynical attitudes need to bring others down to their level, which is to be pitied and I'm sure on some level we've all been there.

However, lets all ensure we won't be there in the future! If we're in a bad mood and someone with us is as chirpy as can be, lets not close off and resent them for it, attempting to infect them with our negativity... instead lets try to open up and allow their positive vibes to fill us and improve our mood!
After all, doesn't it feel better to be happy? More free to be positive? As well as making us more productive. If we're down about an injustice, because negativity is draining and creates a feeling of hopelessness, I believe if one wishes to solve that problem one needs to be positive, hopeful for change!

"Don't be afraid to laugh or smile when you're hurting. They have the power to heal. Let them"

Don't be afraid to express an opinion you have as raw as it feels. Don't feel the need to put an edge to it or add something less "nice" if its not what you believe. Your thought out opinion is as equal and important as everyone else's. Don't presume people won't appreciate it even if you think its too "goody two shoes-ish." there will be those who agree and are so glad you said it and maybe they're the people who you're meant to surround yourself with? And if no one agrees, who cares, pursue your belief because you do!

Now to address those who may actually be faking happiness on an everyday basis or at times throughout your life.
       
Its  OK to be sad. You are entitled to feel any emotion that you do feel and you should not feel ashamed or like you cannot tell anyone, like you have to cover it up.

Faking joy or excitement is pointless and does not mean you will instantly achieve the emotion you are imitating. You are avoiding a problem that needs to be dealt with and can be. Acceptance is key and that is why we often need to frown before we smile so that we can realise that yes, I am sad but I don't have to stay this way, I can pick myself up and see that the situation isn't as bad as I thought it was, there's more to life and always a reason to keep going.

Being genuine is extremely attractive and is so much better for ones own soul. There's a big difference between accepting that you're sad and dealing with it, aiming to get better and find the light, and being cynical, wallowing in self pity and dragging others down with you.

If you're not genuine in your feelings, then where can you be genuine?

So to conclude, I highly disagree with those that think people who are happy a large percentage of the time are "fake", being nice is not a bad thing and you don't have to balance it out with a negative edge.

What do you believe on this topic? Have you experienced it in your everyday lives?

                                                       Love, 
                                                          Rachel!=)