Competitivness

I was always that kid in P.E class who thought they were in the Olympics. I genuinely was. I'd turn small things into a competition and if I cared about the actual thing then the competitive streak in me would be strengthened. However, this tendency to compete with others to be the best at sport, school, your job, being liked or having the most money is pretty pathetic, don't you think? Yet in a lot of cases being competitive is encouraged. I mean I remember my English teacher having that attitude completely. "I'm going to put you next to girl's who are excellent or better than you at English so there'll be a bit of competition" What???? Its a horrible, soul destroying thing to encourage, particularly with something as creative as English. 

For Example, My best friend Lauren is unbelievable at English (I mean incredible) and I also would have a passion for writing, however, not only do we have very different writing styles, but she is also a lot better than me. If I were to become competitive with her it wouldn't just damage our friendship but It would be pointless because I would be basing my success off of another person. If you're going to be competitive, be so with yourself. Be the best person you can be and work hard to do so but don't look and compare to other people, it won't make you happy.

Its a very unattractive thing to have in your behavior as well. To hear someone constantly try to one up you in a certain area or in general life is exhausting and leads to you resenting the other person which is never a good thing! Also, to think that when a person might be in competition mode that they would do anything to get what they want is kind of scary. A rugby player may lash out physically to get the ball but to think that someone would pull you down and like it when you mess up just so that they can be on top... I mean where's the empathy? Where's the inner peace? Where's the security within yourself to accept you for who you  are, not for how great you'd be if you could do something the way someone else does it. You have talents no matter how obvious or discreet they may be. And if you're talent is to play the trombone but Andrew in your class can play it better, why does it matter?

"How quiet the forest would be if the only birds that sang were the ones that sang best"

Are you doing it to be the best or because you love it? You can't keep doing something for the praise and if you don't enjoy whatever you like doing without it then there's no point in doing it. An opinion, a medal, notoriety or money is not worth doing what is wrong, losing your head and being unkind and thus sacrificing your own happiness. Your enjoyment for the activity should lift you above those comments so that you only feel like you want to do it after someone's told you you're good.

And its stressful to constantly be competing with someone, whenever they win/ do better at something you feel bad about yourself, bitter and the feeling of jealousy or even hatred. Why put yourself through that when you can stop it?

Now, for those of you who feel like competition brings about a motivation, without it people wouldn't really do things. I disagree. One's motivation in life should never be dependent on external sources or circumstances because one cannot control them. They change for better or worse so easily. Secondly competition can depress and create a sense of hopelessness if the person keeps "failing" at being better. Essentially, in my opinion (and I'd love to hear yours) I believe one's motivation should never come from a negative place like that and it should be solid. You'll probably feel like the work you do is even better because you'll be focusing in on yourself and eliminating the distraction of glancing over at Cindy in your class to see what she's doing.

All in all, from today forward would you agree with me in us all making the effort to think differently about what we generally get competitive in and realise though we've always been trained to think that we have to aim to be the best all the time, that that is a very pressurising, depressing and unnecessary thing to try to do. It doesn't matter if you came 75th if you've been fair in getting there, compassionate, and content with yourself. If you can retain your happiness as you watch a bunch of headless chickens at the top of the ladder then you're instantly winning.

                                                            Love,
                                                                Rachel =)