Competitivness

I was always that kid in P.E class who thought they were in the Olympics. I genuinely was. I'd turn small things into a competition and if I cared about the actual thing then the competitive streak in me would be strengthened. However, this tendency to compete with others to be the best at sport, school, your job, being liked or having the most money is pretty pathetic, don't you think? Yet in a lot of cases being competitive is encouraged. I mean I remember my English teacher having that attitude completely. "I'm going to put you next to girl's who are excellent or better than you at English so there'll be a bit of competition" What???? Its a horrible, soul destroying thing to encourage, particularly with something as creative as English. 

For Example, My best friend Lauren is unbelievable at English (I mean incredible) and I also would have a passion for writing, however, not only do we have very different writing styles, but she is also a lot better than me. If I were to become competitive with her it wouldn't just damage our friendship but It would be pointless because I would be basing my success off of another person. If you're going to be competitive, be so with yourself. Be the best person you can be and work hard to do so but don't look and compare to other people, it won't make you happy.

Its a very unattractive thing to have in your behavior as well. To hear someone constantly try to one up you in a certain area or in general life is exhausting and leads to you resenting the other person which is never a good thing! Also, to think that when a person might be in competition mode that they would do anything to get what they want is kind of scary. A rugby player may lash out physically to get the ball but to think that someone would pull you down and like it when you mess up just so that they can be on top... I mean where's the empathy? Where's the inner peace? Where's the security within yourself to accept you for who you  are, not for how great you'd be if you could do something the way someone else does it. You have talents no matter how obvious or discreet they may be. And if you're talent is to play the trombone but Andrew in your class can play it better, why does it matter?

"How quiet the forest would be if the only birds that sang were the ones that sang best"

Are you doing it to be the best or because you love it? You can't keep doing something for the praise and if you don't enjoy whatever you like doing without it then there's no point in doing it. An opinion, a medal, notoriety or money is not worth doing what is wrong, losing your head and being unkind and thus sacrificing your own happiness. Your enjoyment for the activity should lift you above those comments so that you only feel like you want to do it after someone's told you you're good.

And its stressful to constantly be competing with someone, whenever they win/ do better at something you feel bad about yourself, bitter and the feeling of jealousy or even hatred. Why put yourself through that when you can stop it?

Now, for those of you who feel like competition brings about a motivation, without it people wouldn't really do things. I disagree. One's motivation in life should never be dependent on external sources or circumstances because one cannot control them. They change for better or worse so easily. Secondly competition can depress and create a sense of hopelessness if the person keeps "failing" at being better. Essentially, in my opinion (and I'd love to hear yours) I believe one's motivation should never come from a negative place like that and it should be solid. You'll probably feel like the work you do is even better because you'll be focusing in on yourself and eliminating the distraction of glancing over at Cindy in your class to see what she's doing.

All in all, from today forward would you agree with me in us all making the effort to think differently about what we generally get competitive in and realise though we've always been trained to think that we have to aim to be the best all the time, that that is a very pressurising, depressing and unnecessary thing to try to do. It doesn't matter if you came 75th if you've been fair in getting there, compassionate, and content with yourself. If you can retain your happiness as you watch a bunch of headless chickens at the top of the ladder then you're instantly winning.

                                                            Love,
                                                                Rachel =)

Success

A successful man?

In many's eyes, through implications anyway, this a very popular picture of what success is in this world. Having a load of money, from a brilliantly paid job topped with power and even fame is probably the most widespread definition of what the term "success" means. I actually just looked it up in a dictionary and its true. The definition is "the attainment of wealth, positions, honors and the like" and another one is "the accomplishment of one's goals". These are the two types of success I want to speak about and then I want to give my own take on such a weighty, human- made- pressurising word.

Jay Z, an iconic rapper and regarded as an extremely successful businessman. He's married to another powerhouse, Beyonce Knowles, and is a good representation of the hip hop/ gangster/ swag chasing/ rap industry which he's referred to himself as being the king of. There are many others I could mention who frequently bring up in their tracks how successful they are because they have money, fame, power, women to have sex with and various other materialistic, flashy things (apart from the women, but that's how they see them). I think that's sad. I genuinely pity them and their view on success which is so dependent on external circumstances. The success itself is very outward based, proving to the world that you are successful instead of being so within. Drake (he's YOLO guy) released a song in 2006 entitled "Success" where the chorus is  "Yeah I want the money/Money and the cars/Cars and the clothes/The hoes/I suppose I just wanna be/I just wanna be successful" To summarise these desires as success is, underneath it all, what a lot of people would count as a fitting one. That to me is where the problem lies.

Moving away from that theory for a second, I want to move onto another one. Ladies and Gentlemen, have you ever heard of Eric Thomas? Hands down one of the best motivational speakers I've ever heard and truly is an inspiration. 

http://www.youtube.com/user/etthehiphoppreacher

This is a link to his YouTube channel and I highly recommend checking it out, you won't be disappointed. However I would like to focus on his mantra which is 

"When you wanna succeed as much as you want to breathe, then you'll be successful"

This is possibly a more extreme version of another hugely accepted formula for success. This theory contains the belief that with hard work and huge amounts of will power you can achieve anything you want to achieve. Eric Thomas uses the phrase constantly and basically says that you can't allow yourself to be distracted with other things apart from working towards what you want to be successful at. You need to want it desperately and sacrifice things for it, a huge example he gives is sleep. He even quotes 50 cent who said "Sleep is for broke people". So to get to the point, this theory of success is very broad, you are left to decide what you want to be successful at whether its academia, getting a promotion at work, losing weight whatever it is this formula will apply if a good work ethic is required. And I agree, we are lazy creatures most of us and motivation is a requirement to get things done however I raise an eyebrow at the extremity of losing sleep and not taking proper care of yourself just for success in these terms. I laugh every time I think of 50 cent's quote because to me sleep is not for broke but for healthy, happy people. If that means poor, then lets live in poverty. This definition for success troubles me in another way too. Once we accomplish a goal, we move onto the next one and the next one and so on. We aren't satisfied and don't deem ourselves successful because we could always be more successful, there will always be someone who is, always a higher position to fill. You're climbing an infinite ladder and if you can't feel it, then is it success?

In my opinion, neither of these mean success. I believe success is happiness. Success is waking up in the morning (after a good night's sleep) and having something to look forward to in the day ahead, to wake up with a smile, to wake up possibly with problems to deal with but no worries because they haven't affected you. Success is holding your patience intact and being able to love even those who act in a way that makes it impossible. Success is loving yourself, looking in the mirror and not cringing or frowning, loving the unhealthy parts of you so that you'll want to make them healthy, falling in love with the weird things you say and the awkward things you do. Success is confidence, when what you laugh at most are the looks of contempt on people's faces as you speak the truth, as you be who you are because they won't. Success is seeing the full pigment in the colours of every thing in the world, to never grow too old and wise to have breath taking moments on this ancient earth, to soak up learning like a sponge and to truly listen to people. Not to pick up when it might be a good time to start speaking yourself, but to actually absorb the words into you. Success is pushing past the gates of lies and being 100% honest with yourself and with everybody, to walk through life with your palms open and allowing yourself to be vulnerable and reveal the amazing thoughts within you. Success is having a calm soul, focused on the present moment and not possessing any bitterness or hate for another individual. Success is knowing with all the certainty you need that no matter what the world throws at you, there is something in you that can overcome any obstacle. Success is when you are grateful, when you have complete awareness of the treasures that exist in your life, that you are breathing being one of them. 

This is success to me. If you've succeeded in being happy internally and connecting with who you are then you are a success and you can never fail. Only with this foundation can you go on and achieve all of the dreams you may have and be able to put the work in to getting them. 

Love,

Rachel! =)

Confidence and Speaking Out!

Confidence is a topic which I am very interested in and I think it is much more complex than people make it out to be. I love the image I used above because its a perfect description of how I feel on the matter. However, before I go into that lets start with the basics.

What is Confidence? We all pretty much know what it is. Its being sure of the truth of something, being secure and being able to rely. Self-confidence is the belief in yourself that you are capable, to have a high sense of  respect for yourself and (shock, horror, disaster:O) to love yourself. We all know people in our lives who we feel is confident, maybe we all even have our own definitions for it. You may even disagree with having confidence and dislike those who do. 

"Confidence is what it takes to stand up and speak. Confidence is also what it takes to sit down and listen"

Wise words from old Churchill, aren't they? Because I suppose most of us think that those people who are really outspoken and well able to voice their opinion are the only confident ones. Is that true? I don't think so. I mean I am that person who always puts their hand up in class and I adore speaking in public, my biggest belief and motto is "Speak Out". However if you don't have the security as well to be able to listen and respect other people when they speak then you possess a huge lack of confidence. People who aren't 100% confident in what they're saying often speak over and shoot down other people's expressed thoughts, they need to keep speaking to reassure themselves and others that what they're saying is correct. While saying this, there is also the possibility that they do have confidence in what they're saying and fighting for, they just mightn't have huge confidence in the outcome (basically they might be afraid that what is wrong will prevail)

So I suppose we can conclude that someone might look confident but in reality be faking it. Just because someone can be the life and soul of a party or scream all the time in class it doesn't mean they're confident. I can generally see right through people who are faking it, but it is difficult because its so complex and as the picture illustrates some days someone could be full of genuine confidence, high self esteem and not care about other people and their opinions and the next feel very self conscious and worthless.  

And what's also strange is that you could have total confidence in one part of you, like your intelligence, and then have zero percent confidence in another for example your appearance. As usual though its what you're insecure about that usually prevails and impacts on your life most.

"Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside of you that is greater than any obstacle"

Like other traits and adjectives we've pinned to people, Confidence is one that is (usually) looked highly upon. People would generally like to think of themselves as confident, and those who don't can you please tell me why? Anyway this desire and high respect for self- assured folk makes others feel that they must appear confident all the time. If you are, then that's terrific but I think its important that we realise we don't need to be invincible and that its perfectly ok to ask for help and admit to weakness on our way to unbreakable confidence. Make sure you're always honest with yourself if you have an insecurity or doubt. If you don't then its not true confidence, its denial.

"Be yourself no matter what they say" That is easier said than done! Bear in mind all that I am in my teenage years which is stereo typically a time where a person goes on a very long search to find themselves (5 years in fact) and then you're supposed to miraculously become fully formed the day you turn eighteen. This isn't always possible for everyone and while I have a very strong sense of who I am, I've often wondered what that phrase "Be yourself" actually means? Like, who am I???? We've all thought this, correct? But deep down I guess we know who we are. The way we act naturally with close friends and family is the most accurate reflection of ourselves. However most of us find it very difficult to act in the same manner to every person we meet, and I suppose confidence ties in majorly with discovering and being who you are. Admit to liking Justin Bieber even if everyone else hates him, do what makes you happy even if they're "weird" because bear in mind those who question or dislike you because of it have their own problems and vulnerability. They've all felt terribly insecure and awkward, suppressed their own desires and wishes because of insecurity. THEY WERE BORN NAKED AND CRYING. :P

"You are beautiful when being yourself, you don't need others to accept you, you just need to accept yourself"

And finally, I would like to address the importance of speaking out. I am an extremely righteous person and I love public speaking, that combination means that I voice my opinion a lot. I totally believe in it. Why be silent when you have something to say? I'm all about honesty and speaking the truth and I think  much too many people are afraid of doing so. At a talk I attended the other day, the point was brought up that women lack the confidence to put themselves out there and the whole belief that women who speak their minds are bitches. This is ridiculous to me and I think it stems from the whole problem that women are almost encouraged to be insecure and self- conscious "You don't know you're beautiful, that's what makes you beautiful" A One Direction lyric. Teenage fan girls (and there are a lot of them)  then feel like rejecting compliments and lacking in confidence is a good thing and after a while of behaving this way, you begin to feel this way. Lacking in confidence can only bring you unhappiness. People in general also put other people's problem of judging onto themselves. If someone judges you critically for saying what you feel that is their problem  not yours. If anyone ever tells you or makes you feel that being confident is wrong that is because they are lacking in confidence and are jealous. Don't become them, you need to move forward because that is their only hope too.

So peeps, "never be silent about things that matter" and "speak the truth even if your voice hurts"

A song that I really connected to and truly motivates me to be myself and speak out is "Read all about it part 3" by Emeli Sande She's really great and I highly recommend clicking the link and giving it a listen!

And your pondering question is...

Are you confident?

Love,

Rachel!=)

A gratitude blog.

    We are unbelievably lucky. You're wondering why I'm including you since I don't even know your circumstances? What your life consists of? I don't need to. I'm talking about how lucky we both are to be alive. We may have many other things to be thankful for or nothing else at all. Regardless we are living so that will be the base of our thanks.

 Why even be thankful for things in our life, accomplishments etc? If you are a pure atheist who doesn't believe in thanking God or a higher being , maybe you've questioned the purpose of this exercise. However its much more than that. Learning the art of gratitude enables you to benefit from the things you do have as opposed to the things you don't. It gives you a passion for life and motivates you . Essentially, it brings you happiness. So its not just a case of being submissive and worshipping an entity up there, its for yourself.

    Thus ladies and gentlemen, in this blog I am to going to write down the main things that I am grateful for  in the hopes of brightening my day and hopefully inspiring you to do the same!

Things I am grateful for....

1. My life. To be alive in this world. I don't know why I'm here or where I'm headed after but I'm alive now and that's great!

2. My mobility. A great fear I have is paralysis. It would be the worst thing that could happen to me and so I am so glad that I have the ability to move freely to wherever I want.

3.My Vision.  I have my sight to be able to see the beautiful things the world has to offer and witness incidents take place and all the big events in my life. Our ability to see is overlooked each and everyday. What would you do without your sight? Just imagine it, total darkness no matter what. You are so lucky to be able to read these words, see these colours. Take advantage of that and really see what's around you, take in the pigment of the colours and observe closely the different sights when you're on holiday or just in an unfamiliar place.

4. My hearing. I felt this needed to be in a seperate section to vision because they're both so important individually. Most of us have a passion for music don't we? Imagine not being able to listen to your favourite song or just feel the way only music can make you feel. Or even certain noises, people talking to you. I think we take all our senses for granted much too often, every day basically.

5. My health. My general health. To be able to get up every morning with no pain or difficulty. To have no physical setbacks, its a blessing. I really should use this revelation to exercise more...

"The essence of all beautiful art, all great art, is gratitude.

Friedrich Nietzsche"

6. The people in my life. My family and friends who surround me. I always have someone to turn to and people to share jokes with, big events and everything really. Connecting with people and being able to share their emotions is kind of beautiful when you think about it. Not everyone is so lucky to have people in their lives with whom they have benefiting relationships.

7. My connection with myself. I've always been someone who is well connected with themselves. I check in with myself a lot to (no matter how cliche it sounds) ensure that I'm happy and following my honest convictions.  Some people aren't as fortunate. So many lose themselves by getting caught up in life and they live day by day without being completely honest with themselves.

8. My Opportunites and Circumstances: I don't know if everyone reading this is so fortunate but I feel so grateful that I am in a peaceful country, which is not at war or enduring a terrible crisis at the moment. I live in a first world country, which may be in a recession, but there are still so many opportunities out there for me. I'm also so grateful for everything I own, there are so many people out there with terrible circumstances in their lives but when you don't encounter them everyday you can forget how lucky you are. Also, we live in a modern age! We have amazing technology at our fingertips and there are so many more rights for women, gays and blacks than there were years ago. Its a great time to live in.

9. My talents. I may not be the best at everything I want to be and since I use to be a perfectionist this fact led me to forget about the things I was good at. We are all good at something and we should value those things! I believe we all have a purpose in the world and no matter what you will fulfill that purpose. Your talents contribute to your purpose which is exciting. So act on them even if you just have one and that one talent is polishing shoes or making buttons. Still counts.

10. My Imagination and dreams . Without them we'd all be pretty boring. Wouldn't we?

I feel like because life is so vast that I'm definately leaving something out or in ten minutes I'll think of something that really should have made my top ten and because it didn't it'll just vanish or something. ;)Despite this, here are my top ten things that I am grateful for in my life. The headings probably aren't that different to yours but the content sure is! I hope you can take the time now to ponder on what you're most grateful for in your life. Trust me it'll lift you out of a bad mood in an instant!

    Of course the question is, 
                                              What are you most grateful for?

                                                                                         Love,
                                                                                               Rachel=)

Judging others.

This is really creepy, but also hilarious.


At a guess, I would say that 99% of the world judge others, even in the most subconscious way.  It is a part of everyday life and every time you meet someone you categorise them and essentially judge them. However there is a big difference between openly judging someone, letting that initial image affect how you see them for the proceeding future and judging someone unwillingly, almost unbeknownst to you. The judgement just slips in before you can rationalise it out. You see, the thing about judging is is that it is so difficult not  to do. And its not a natural response. When we're born we have no intentions to judge. Kids don't judge other kids. It is clearly the media and society which has instilled this in us. However I believe that it is possible to take steps to eliminate judging others from our lives.



Imagine a world in which, instead of judging others, we accept ourselves. And self-acceptance can help us stop judging others.


Back to what I mentioned earlier, about people judging others openly and consciously, almost enjoying it and making no effort to stop. I believe that this is derived from insecurity and as the quote above says, a lack of self-acceptance. When people point out others on the street for looking "weird" or point people out for practically anything is that not a clear indication that they have issues with themselves and need other people to feel bad because they do. We've all been there, and if you haven't then congrats because you're pretty rare. In general though I would imagine that nearly everyone reading this has criticised someone because of the way they look, their beliefs etc. And looking back do you really think you were happy? If you're still doing it do you really think you are happy? I highly disapprove of judging others because everyone has a story, no one is going to be entirely what you judge them to be. We're much too complicated than that. 

I also feel that judging people holds yourself back in life too. If you judge other people for failing school, making loads of noise in a church or wearing a lipstick that's too dark then I am convinced you will hold an underlying fear of doing those things as well.  A lot of judgemental people I know are also very self- conscious, a feared and jittery people. I'm not surprised either. You're so immersed into the judgement circle that you can't forget other people's opinions of you when you stand up to speak. To me, Judging others, like hate, is another classic example of something that is deemed normal in society but still isn't right. Just because everyone else does it doesn't mean you can't be the first to eliminate it from your life. 

Unfortunately, I still judge people. However I have progressed a lot further into the subconscious realm of judging. Its still unfair but at least I'm aware of it and try to prevent it from going any further than an initial split second. And to be honest I feel a lot happier and I've kind of forgotten that people judge me every moment of every day. The thought and the pressure just vanishes. I'm also confident that one day I can forget judging other people entirely because I care so much about it.

Also, to all of us who hold a fear of being judged, are afraid to act a certain way or wear a certain thing because you're worried of what people might think just know that its their problem not yours. They're people just like you and they have no power over you. I know looks and sneers especially can tear you down along with words and such but its just an illusion in your mind that's blowing them up to be more frightening than they are. All they are are unattractive expressions of pain and insecurity. Haha, don't judge them for it!;)

So I am putting a task to all you readers out there, to just give me this week, until next Friday where you try to not judge a single soul. Where you try to think about how you don't know their story and ask yourself how it would make you feel to be judged on your appearance, morals, walk etc. See how you feel at the end of it. 

There are some great quotes on Judging so I'l leave ye with a few.

"Go ahead. Judge me. Just remember to be perfect for the rest of your life."

"Judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who you are."

"Don't judge me. There's a reason I do what I do, there's a reason I am who I am" 

"When I am able to resist the temptation to judge others, I can see them as teachers of forgiveness in my life, reminding me that I can only have peace of mind when I forgive rather than judge."

Love,
               Rachel!=)

    

Love

                                                     

As its Valentine's Day I thought it fitting to make a blog post on the most important topic in the world I guess, love. And despite it being the most important thing in all our lives we tend to misuse it, abuse it and take it for granted.

I personally believe in true love. I also believe in soul mates. I think as regards relationships and dating, people rush into things and commit themselves to people they don't truly love. I don't understand the concept of divorce because I don't get why you would say you will spend the rest of your life with someone through hell or high water and then leave the relationship? (Obviously I think divorce should certainly be an option because no one should be stuck in unhappiness) but  I suppose its just a question that stirs in my mind sometimes, you know you hear of celebrities in particular who divorce their partners within two weeks and make precautions for an easy divorce before they get married. I mean, what's the point? I'd hope that if I ever do get married its to someone I adore and will stay with for the rest of my life. Surely that's everyone's goal?

One thing that breaks up marriages and destroys the name of love are affairs. Cheating is one thing that has always been able to get under my skin. I don't know why but my heart sinks whenever its brought up, I'm convinced (as I believe in reincarnation) that I was cheated on in a past life. Its the only explanation I can think of for the feeling I get with it. I don't know why people cheat, the urge is obviously derived from unhappiness within the marriage/ relationship but as its often been said, why not just leave? I guess its not as simple as that. However one belief I will never lose is that love is not based off of sex. I am much too prudish when it comes to that sort of thing but regardless I don't get why its so talked about. Why it breaks up love through cheating and why people replace love with it?

I believe that love is not just between a man and a woman. I used to be fanatically pro homosexuality( to a creepy point) but I still whole- heartily feel that love between a man and a man and a woman and a woman  is equal to heterosexual love. I am completely pro gay marriage and what I dislike is that even though attitudes towards gays and bisexuals has enormously improved, with their legal rights growing and growing, the attitudes a lot of (particularly) young people have towards them is rather backwards. Phrases I hate are "That's so gay" and "You faggot" often just used in a funny context but does that mean they should be used? I also know as a teenage girl that it wouldn't be welcomed with open arms for a teenage boy to admit he was gay. Why do the youth have the prejudices? I thought that would be the confused old people who felt uncomfortable...

I always laugh when I hear people my age, still technically a child, exclaim in distress "I'm Forever Alone" because they don't have a Valentine today or a boyfriend in general. I don't know if the opposite gender have those worries, but its blatantly obvious that us females do. This is coming from someone who has never had a boyfriend, its OK to be single at 16, you have time to snatch a boy out of desperation. Don't fret. I think a lot of people say it (a) to have the person they're saying it to tell them "that's rubbish" and "they'll break hearts" (b) they hear everyone else say it and it slips out (c) they genuinely have developed this irrational fear and have lost all logical thinking. Let's not blame them. No matter what age we are (unless you're like ten reading this)I think its fair to say that most of us have worried about the prospect of dieing alone. However, what's meant to be will be!

All in all, I'm not flashing my middle finger to the Valentine's Day section in Tesco because I think its cool that we have a day devoted to love, I hope today we all reflected on love in our lives and valued it. Because without it, where would we be?

Do you believe in true love?

                                                       Love, (how many times have I mentioned the word in this post?;))

                                                           Rachel!=)

Quotations Sunday: An Introduction

    Quotes are my source of Inspiration. I know they may be totally out of perspective in comparison to what's going on in my life but with most quotes I read I can relate them back to my circumstances and grow emotionally as another jigsaw puzzle fits into a place, another patch of fog is cleared. Often the ones that I am most inspired by are the simplest, and though I hate the word, 'common sense'. But when a thought or feeling is put into words so I can understand it, well that to me is a euphoric moment. I also find that I tend to connect with quotes which are logical(don't close your mind, I don't mean boring!) but I just think logically  I guess. I know zillions of quotes and almost always include them in deep conversations with friends, family, my dog, myself....
        So I've decided to do a series of posts on this blog where every Sunday I post a quote I love/ am inspired by and give my interpretation of it. I'm going to begin with my all time favourite quote. Its by the great Martin Luther King.

I read this quote from an 'Inspiring Quote' App on my phone when I was lying in a bed in a London B&B back in October. I can remember the moment that clearly. As basic as it is, I feel the way he put it and its logic just changed my life. Now that's slightly melodramatic but it genuinely has. It makes so much sense to me because obviously you can't get rid of the dark by adding more dark, you need light so obviously you can't get rid of hate just by adding more hate! You need love to do that. And when I looked back on all my experiences in life when I hated and was nasty to people who initiated that attitude towards me it just led to more and more hate and negativity being poured into the world. If you don't hate someone who hates you back it doesn't mean you're a fool. You don't have to approach them everyday and hug them, but if you do not hold resentment for them and treat them with love and respect regardless of how they treat you then you are happier internally and you are not fueling  the hatred fire for the world to burn in. I am proud to say that I don't hate anyone. I have certainly got a long way to go, and I don't think deeply enough about my words and actions towards other people yet and maybe I can't hold my tongue all the time when I'm in a bad mood but I genuinely don't. Its actually a very powerful thing to feel because unfortunately hate is normal in life and I don't understand that. Hate is terrible for the mind and soul(if you believe in souls of course) but regardless it impedes your life.
   
Let me know if this quote impacted on your life as much as it did mine;) and regardless I hope you like the idea of what I'm trying to do every Sunday! Any feedback on the blog so far would be much appreciated,
                                                             Love (and absolutely no hate!)
                                                                    Rachel!=)
                                                   

Happiness

Happiness: My 2 Cents...

             Happiness is the one thing I will agree that all of us have in common. Though diverse in many extremes, what keeps us going in this great mystery called life is that feeling, that feeling I will never attempt to describe.

             Despite happiness being alls' true aim in life, why is it that so many people cannot maintain a euphoric moment and why do we live in the future, procrastinating being happy until another day? Now don't assume I'm preaching , at the moment I stand just as confused about life as you may be.

             I believe in a false happiness and a true happiness. A false happiness presents itself when you get that glee from bitching, from mocking someone, from being negative and getting that laugh. Its so subtle in most situations but I feel that all of these things are bred from insecurity, UN happiness within yourself. Believe me, I feel like the biggest victim to these traps.

             However on the other side, there is true happiness. Happiness that does not vanish after your Mom shouts at you, you fail that test or gain a few inches. This happiness I can only dream about. I think it will be like living in a state of mind that I've never achieved before. I won't compare it to a sugar rush because you always come down, nor the night before holidays because the adrenaline rush won't be present. It'll simply be contentment.

            And I'm not the only one (duh) who's thought deeply about such matters. I recently read "The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin in which she endeavours to attempt all means to feel more grateful for what she has in her life. In other words to be happy. In her quest she read many people's opinion on happiness. From Pluto to modern thinkers they all gave their share. I could tell you dozens upon dozens of truly inspiring 'happiness quotes'. We've all heard them (I love them), read the theories but why still can't we, as a whole, achieve paradise?

        I think coolness has replaced happiness. There is such a huge desire to be cool and funny. One may argue that a person being thought of as cool might make them happy but isn't that like false happiness? Its sort of based off of insecurity and a need for people to like you, to fit in. In that respect, does that mean that confidence is the key to eternal happiness? The disposition in which you truly could not care what people thought of you, you possessed utter faith in your morals, capabilities and dreams. I think we may have just found the gem. That's all jolly fine though but confidence is a difficult thing to achieve for it is such a complex matter. You could have complete confidence in one sector and zero percent in another. However I am convinced that confidence goes hand in hand with happiness.

         Up to now you may feel that I've just been discussing an individual, internal issue but one person's point of happiness affects the whole world's. I know that if a person is sufficiently confident and happy in themselves to give me a genuine compliment, it brightens my whole day. Even a flippant one can increase a person's happiness to spread to all they meet.

         In the opposite way, madness, judgement and cruelty all have the domino effect. Because of this I call on everyone to try and spread some positivity in the world through a smile, a compliment, simply good intentions because I guarantee you karma will not take long and you will receive the benefits. Its about time that we all do what makes us happy and respect that person who doesn't give a hoot what people think of them. In fact, let's not simply admire them, let's become them.

NB: Everything mentioned above is simply my opinion. I would love to hear everyone else's idea of happiness so maybe I could become inspired!:)

                                 

                                                   Love,

                                                         Rachel!=)
My video on this topic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4MO1nUwc7M