Suicide

Donal Walsh.

The above image is of a boy, who certainly deserves to be called a man. His life in this world ended on the 12th May 2013. Donal Walsh lived for 16 years on earth, 4 of which he spent fighting cancer. We all know cancer, have heard or been affected by it in some form, however I myself received a completely new insight into the unbelievable pain it causes physically, mentally and emotionally after reading this article where Donal himself speaks of the struggles as large as "mountains" that he had to face in his personal battle against cancer.

His determination in fighting the odds and surviving much longer than expected, in rehabilitation being able to walk again after six weeks when it was only expected for him to do so six months on, his strength in being able to discuss his inevitable death so openly and maturely in interviews and articles, as well as keeping his spirits and positivity levels up to a place where he could leave an impression on the people and make a difference to the world he was leaving behind. His intelligence in being able to gain a perspective on the world, think of himself as not being better than anyone else "We are all the same, we are all given one body, one mind. The only difference for me is that I'm looking from the mountain" An absolutely incredible thing to say.

I, like the whole nation, have become inspired by him, so much so that I felt the need to write this blog post in his honour but also to honour the message he wished to leave the world with. 

"Suicide is not a permanent solution to a temporary problem."

So for the remainder of this post I am going to give my views on the topic of taking your own life in order for even just one more person to become inspired by Donal's message and seek help.

I've read Donal speaking about how it makes him "angry that these people choose to take their lives, to ruin their families and to leave behind a mess that no one can clean up" Do you agree with him? Can you see his side of view? I don't believe it is as simple for what is going on inside the person's mind but I can understand his anger greatly.

Now, in preparation for this blog post I spoke to someone who has suffered from depression in the past, I wanted an accurate view of something I had never experienced or gone through myself. One thing they said that struck me was that for people contemplating suicide it doesn't feel like a choice. They think this is the only option. I could imagine how someone suffering from severe depression could think that because the mind is very powerful, it can make you convinced that things aren't possible when they are, it can narrow your options so that you feel you've only one when you don't, it can make things up and pretend they're real when they aren't. Our minds are often not rational and as I learned from speaking to this person, depression is not what a lot of us may think it is which is a deep sadness. You feel nothing and find it incredibly difficult to care about things. You feel hopeless. And of course not every person who feels depressed contemplates suicide but those who do feel like it is the only way out. 

"Having a rough morning?
Place your hand over your heart.
Feel that?
That's called purpose.
You're alive for a reason.
Don't give up."

However I am not going to continue to talk anymore about depression, something I can honestly say I have never been through and so cannot give advice. All I know, from speaking to this person with first hand experience and my own reasoning, is that help is the answer, seeking someone or a service that will listen to you is vital. Depression can also lead out from suppressed feelings, angst turned inwards. Everyone says it but its true, don't suffer it alone when there are so many people out there who want to help you and can. You may not think you have the right to or that you're weird and won't be accepted but you are not a bad person for feeling this way or not feeling at all. Do not be ashamed or judge yourself for your own thoughts, there are many other people who have gone through the same thing and reaching out to someone professionally or otherwise in good faith will help you realise this but also hopefully put things into perspective and guide you towards progress.

"There is always hope.
The world is vast and meant for wandering.
There is always somewhere else to go."

I truly believe that suicide is not the answer. You might feel so weak and deceived by your mind that the world is a terrible place, nowhere to turn, nowhere to escape to except for death. This is so untrue. Firstly,  know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle. Sometimes we want to give up so badly but it is so important to persevere, just know that you CAN keep going no matter what has happened to you or is going on in your life, no matter where you are or what you think the the future holds. You can survive it. Think about yourself, think of all you've been through, all the happy times, the times you've looked in the mirror and yeah you've thought you looked good, the times you looked at someone with love and felt that incredible feeling or when you received it. Think of your dreams, your plans, the times you've felt proud or enthralled. Think of the whole range of emotions you've felt, think of the negative ones too and think of how you overcame them. Connect with yourself and realise that you've felt pain before, maybe this is the worst you've ever experienced but you will come through it. Pain itself is temporary, eventually time will heal and the pain will leave you. Strength. Strength. Strength.
To address the latter, you may feel hopeless, like the world is a terrible place. The spark of life has left and everything is dull. Look at the above quote and listen to this "Such wonderful things surround you". There is so much beauty in this world, so many amazing people and places, so many breath taking moments to be had, that to think there isn't is false and unjust to the world that is so busy and interesting. However I know a lack of perspective can get the better of us and we only see the crappy world in our mind or immediate situation, but lets broaden this tight perspective and stretch our imagination, realise that there is always a different route to go down and there will always be beauty in this world. Yes, I am not so naieve to think there isn't tragedy and problems but I am a big believer in change and if you find yourself bogged down on the negatives that exist in life, don't give up on it, why not put all your efforts into changing injustice in the world? If you're upset, hopeless about something you most certainly can't change then acceptance and embracing is necessary, changing one's attitude. Gratitude is so important. It can transform your life and bring a buzzing feeling to you about what's around you.Really look at everything in your immediate surroundings, taking in every single pigment of every single colour, every little detail we usually skim over. I do this in lots of places and I'm asking you now, why not give it a try? It will help.

"Worry is the deposit for a problem"

Do you ever look back on the past? Cringe or feel huge regret? Long for it to be like it was back then or just can't seem to leave it behind where it belongs? There is no point. We cannot change the past and what we've done, regret is useless and harmful. We cannot look into the future (we humans overestimate our confidence in knowing what lies ahead) and we don't know what's to come, nothing happens as you expect it will and YOU have the power to change it, take the power you have over your mind live in the present, if things aren't going well we need to try and find something positive to pull us through to a future we can make great.


So, friends, that is my appeal to you if you have ever, are, or may in the future contemplate taking your own life. Know that you are so much stronger than that and to refer back to Donal's case, I'd like to remind you, like he did, that life is precious. You are so ridiculously fortunate to be alive right now, everything else is a bonus but you have life, something so many don't have. Donal himself said he wished he's had even a few more months alive but he didn't have a choice, you may not think it but the choice is entirely yours. You are so fortunate and please remember this each and everyday. Pain is so unbelievably hard to bear sometimes but you are well able to. It will go away. Who knows what life will bring?

No matter who you are reading this, you may be young, old, white, black, overweight, underweight, loud, quiet, boy, girl, it doesn't matter. No matter who you are please use this post, my honour and sharing of what the great donal Walsh aimed to spread, as a sign, guide or reason to not commit suicide. You deserve this life and are strong enough to seek help and come through the other side which is happiness. 

Stay Strong.

Love,
Rachel! =)