Debating/ Methods of Arguing.

 For anyone who doesn't know, this is an activity where people are given a motion or topic followed by a side or opinion to fight. There are two sides, the Proposition and the Opposition and depending on which side you're on you cannot accept the other side's points and must shoot them down, essentially in an effort to make your opinion win. I genuinely tried to keep that objective. 

However as you can tell from my initial statement that is very difficult for me because I have many reasons for disliking the hobby and have my own views on arguing.

I took part in my school's debating society for a few years. When I was 13 and 14 I liked it a lot but upon returning to it this year I found that I had changed immensely since then. I looked at the whole game with completely new eyes. You see, I'm a very righteous person. If I see something occurring which I think is wrong I can't sit by and watch it happening. I cannot fight for something that I don't believe in. And since in debating you are given an opinion to argue, regardless of how you truly feel on the matter, it obviously isn't going to settle with me. 

I think my first problem with debating is that I feel opinions are extremely valuable and deserve the utmost respect. My moralistic personality doesn't comprehend how you can let go of your own opinion so easily. There's a process you go through in forming an opinion. You look at both sides, weave in emotions and passions to produce the final product. Its important to me. So when debaters give up their opinions and change sides so quickly alarm bells go off in my head. I think its an insult to one of the most vital and driving forces in the world.

As I am righteous I also disagree with glorifying what you feel is wrong. What I mean by that is I feel  with debaters and lawyers its more about how the person fights the case rather than the point or topic itself. Do you see where I'm coming from? If the person fighting is particularly skilled and talented then it takes away from the points they are giving. What is wrong may triumph just because the person arguing that side or for that person was better than the individual working for what was right.

And now for what I've only concluded recently, a practice I still have to perfect. This my friends, is the art of arguing. For any debaters (who have not stopped reading this to write me a strongly worded comment), let me tell you something you may not have been aware of. When you shout and become aggressive while fighting your point you have instantly failed in your attempt to convince anyone to believe in what your saying. This is true of all arguing. Just think about it for a second, when someone raises their voice to you and is so bull- like determined to get their point out there and inflicted on you, how do you respond? Its our natural reaction to become defensive and argue back, We close our mind and all we want to do is win the fight. This is why I hold the belief that when someone's expressing their opinion (no matter how much you may disagree with it) its important to keep and open mind and know that you don't always have to be right. If someone gives a point that makes you change your mind on a certain topic, its ok! Its not you being weak but actually very strong. We need to bring to the surface more of what is right and what is honest truth. Its not about our egos and needing to be victorious all the time, this is insecurity, its about letting go of yourself and being genuine, no matter what.

I hope you take this on board when you're discussing a topic in real life too, don't lower yourself by raising your voice, keep calm and smile. Discuss your point in a level headed manner because this confuses the other steaming person no end. It also makes for a more truthful opinion. Bear in mind that if you're confident in what you're saying you don't need to become flustered and start bellowing. 

I hope some debaters reading this will ponder on what I've said, you're much more convincing if you can be kind and admit to agreeing with some points of the other side. If you disagree with me please let me know!( I'm sure ye're well able) I just haven't found a positive attribute to the sport, I might one day:) And let us all move forward with our arguments being calm and productive because its very easy to shout louder than the next person but if you're right you don't need to!

What's your opinion on debating and arguing? 

Love,

Rachel!=)

Behavior: Attractive and Unattractive.

    In this post, I want to touch on how certain portrayal's of insecurities are likable to  people and how other displays repel.But in General, I find that behavior is highly misunderstood.  
     If one person, we'll call him John, is very insecure about many parts of himself and those insecurities lead him to behave quietly, inwardly, in a way where he's constantly putting himself down and trying to please everybody then I can guarantee you that most people would like him and try to boost his confidence in himself. Am I right?
    Then if we take another example, Mary, who also has many insecurities, but as opposed to John, she acts in a loud manner, trying to put other people down to make herself just that little bit more satisfied with herself, constantly boasting herself or seeking compliments. Then we would more than likely give up on her, not bother to look deeper into why she's behaving this way or find the connection she has with John and treat her the same way. It is people like Mary that a lot of people dislike and find annoying. So what do we do? We ignore them or act negatively towards them which leads to a vicious circle of their poor attitude. 
    Essentially, I think its important that we try and review the people we find annoying in our lives and begin to attempt to understand that the way they act is not always the most accurate reflection of how they're feeling inside. When we're rude or mean, I'm convinced it comes from hurt on the inside and I'll say it again, insecurity. I am no expert but I've come to this conclusion from my own thoughts and experiences. So to all who read this, that is your task. Peel away a few more layers from the 'Mary's' in your life because if you think about it, we're all so deep that how could the surface layer reflect to the world what our core really looks like?

Anger is a manifestation of a deeper issue... and that, for me, is based on insecurity, self-esteem and loneliness.
Naomi Campbell 
                                                       
                                                                     Love,
                                                        Rachel!=)
My Video on this topic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6O1Uzb93WE

Happiness

Happiness: My 2 Cents...

             Happiness is the one thing I will agree that all of us have in common. Though diverse in many extremes, what keeps us going in this great mystery called life is that feeling, that feeling I will never attempt to describe.

             Despite happiness being alls' true aim in life, why is it that so many people cannot maintain a euphoric moment and why do we live in the future, procrastinating being happy until another day? Now don't assume I'm preaching , at the moment I stand just as confused about life as you may be.

             I believe in a false happiness and a true happiness. A false happiness presents itself when you get that glee from bitching, from mocking someone, from being negative and getting that laugh. Its so subtle in most situations but I feel that all of these things are bred from insecurity, UN happiness within yourself. Believe me, I feel like the biggest victim to these traps.

             However on the other side, there is true happiness. Happiness that does not vanish after your Mom shouts at you, you fail that test or gain a few inches. This happiness I can only dream about. I think it will be like living in a state of mind that I've never achieved before. I won't compare it to a sugar rush because you always come down, nor the night before holidays because the adrenaline rush won't be present. It'll simply be contentment.

            And I'm not the only one (duh) who's thought deeply about such matters. I recently read "The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin in which she endeavours to attempt all means to feel more grateful for what she has in her life. In other words to be happy. In her quest she read many people's opinion on happiness. From Pluto to modern thinkers they all gave their share. I could tell you dozens upon dozens of truly inspiring 'happiness quotes'. We've all heard them (I love them), read the theories but why still can't we, as a whole, achieve paradise?

        I think coolness has replaced happiness. There is such a huge desire to be cool and funny. One may argue that a person being thought of as cool might make them happy but isn't that like false happiness? Its sort of based off of insecurity and a need for people to like you, to fit in. In that respect, does that mean that confidence is the key to eternal happiness? The disposition in which you truly could not care what people thought of you, you possessed utter faith in your morals, capabilities and dreams. I think we may have just found the gem. That's all jolly fine though but confidence is a difficult thing to achieve for it is such a complex matter. You could have complete confidence in one sector and zero percent in another. However I am convinced that confidence goes hand in hand with happiness.

         Up to now you may feel that I've just been discussing an individual, internal issue but one person's point of happiness affects the whole world's. I know that if a person is sufficiently confident and happy in themselves to give me a genuine compliment, it brightens my whole day. Even a flippant one can increase a person's happiness to spread to all they meet.

         In the opposite way, madness, judgement and cruelty all have the domino effect. Because of this I call on everyone to try and spread some positivity in the world through a smile, a compliment, simply good intentions because I guarantee you karma will not take long and you will receive the benefits. Its about time that we all do what makes us happy and respect that person who doesn't give a hoot what people think of them. In fact, let's not simply admire them, let's become them.

NB: Everything mentioned above is simply my opinion. I would love to hear everyone else's idea of happiness so maybe I could become inspired!:)

                                 

                                                   Love,

                                                         Rachel!=)
My video on this topic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4MO1nUwc7M