Taking Risks

Taking risks are fundamental for progress in life yet we all find it difficult to undertake the tasks involved. I know I do. I'm in Transition Year in my school at the moment, twelve months where partakers take a look at life through a non-academic viewpoint and try new things. I became inspired to write this post based on a girl in my year (hello Heather:P) who is embarking on an 8 week exchange to France followed by school in the USA. Another girl headed off to be an Au Pair in France for 5 months. Fairly daunting isn't it? These are big risks to take, anxiety causing because there's an underlying fear of whether you'll enjoy it or not. What if you hate it? Risks breed questions. Much too many of them as well.

"The only way to find true happiness is to risk being completely cut open. –Chuck Palahniuk"

And there are many different levels of risk taking. You might take a risk and say something that you've always wanted to say to someone or you might join the army. An immense difference. So I suppose we could say that we take risks, whether minor or major, everyday. We're very familiar with the fear and adrenaline that often comes with them. Are they good things to experience? Some people think so, others don't. Some people are so afraid of taking risks that they live their lives in comfort zones. Its so easy to do, isn't it? I know in Acting it can be really difficult to push yourself to be ridiculous and in general life too we often find ourselves refusing to jump out of the circle of comfort we've created ourselves. I believe that jumping is the best approach to take, like a bandage if you do it slowly and consciously then its so much more painful and worse, so easy to stop and retreat, placing the plaster back onto the cut.

"It seems to be a law of nature, inflexible and inexorable, that those who will not risk cannot win. – John Paul Jones"

    I think that they are vital. Yes, all risks come with the possibility of failing but isn't it better to fail then to be on this constant level of dullness. You never know what could happen unless you try and even if things do go wrong its experience. It was meant to happen. I guess another element of taking risks is confidence. You need to believe in yourself that you're going to make it work, because doing something 50% is pointless and inevitably leads to failed risks, thus the bad name for risk taking and impulsive thinking. And if you feel that the fear of being judged is holding you back from taking a risk then simply don't let it. Who cares if you look sad and pathetic? Who cares if you look weird? Who cares if mid- jump you flop down like a chicken having a heart attack? Only you, its only you.

"When was the last time you did something for the first time?"

  I love this quote. Its like a boost to the system to get out of the routine you've inevitably fallen into and experiment more with life, avail of a broader range of the services that life has to offer. Yes its frightening and its super easy to chicken out and not do it but its worth it. If the fear is too great then just bear in mind that everything will be alright in the end. Life goes on. If you fail terribly at a chance you took its not the end of the world, you will have good days again.

  I feel like we should appreciate and respect those around us who are tremendous risk takers. They are truly inspirational and we should learn from them so we can all become wild and free:P  All the best to Heather whose leaving tomorrow on her big adventure and to anyone else who has taken the leap. Remember what I've said, regardless of what risk it is its one you want to do so its not wrong. Make the best of the circumstances you find yourself in and you'll thank yourself in the end. You're stronger than a lot of people right now and you're challenging your comfort zone. All bear in mind that life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it. You are the only one stopping yourself!

                                                                                           Love,
                                                                                                 Rachel=)


  

Quotations Sunday: Evil

I read this quote on face book recently and it instantly summed up my belief on Evil and its relationship with human beings.

All Harry Potter nerds will be delighted to see (I believe it is Sirius Black?) starring in the photo and however much you may wish to kill me for admitting this, I cannot quite recall where this line featured in the series but I completely agree with it. I don't believe in 'evil', the term given to something or someone who is rotten to the core, no goodness in them whatsoever and as the quote says "a bad person". I wholeheartedly believe that any negative traits a person possesses or any terrible acts they perform are derived from bad things happening in their lives. It may seem very idealistic and naive but that doesn't mean its not true. People are very quick to judge people by their surface and label them bad or evil( I know I have in the past) and if they don't use those exact terms they call them something like a "bitch" or an "asshole". This is a very simplistic view of a human being. You couldn't possibly have a clue of what has gone on in their lives to make them who they are today. Even if they do asshole-ish things or say something bitchy it doesn't mean you can label them that term. I don't know why it is all of ours' natural instincts to become angry by someone having problems in their lives, mine included, but I feel like pity would be more fitting, don't you think?

The main reason I came to the conclusion that evil doesn't exist is because every time I would slam the door after a fight with a family member or say something mean to someone, I knew in myself that the source of these 'bad' acts was hurt. I knew well that I wasn't a bad person or evil, I was just hurt within myself and wasn't strong or secure enough to hold my temper. And while you can argue that serial killers and the like did much more catastrophic things I remain adamant that they are not evil people. Everyone's mind is made of different material strengths, some have theirs made of the most delicate tissue paper which can be destroyed unbelievably easily to a point where it is messed up and its previous beauty is unrecognisable. Others are made of stronger stuff who can handle frequent attack. As weird an analogy as that was I think it sums up what I'm trying to say well. You don't know whats going on inside someone's mind, remember all you get is their behaviour and we all know that is not always an accurate reflection of our internal thoughts and feelings. 

Going back to the quote, I love how simple but effective it is. It is so comforting and reassuring and I feel like  its approach is a lot more powerful than becoming aggressive at someone's 'evil' appearance. If you think about it, the worst thing we can tell people who have done awful things is that they are bad people because that steals any hope for change within them. If we can allow them to believe that they are good people and have the capabilities to match their behaviour, then they can take the steps towards improvement and happiness. So I hope we can all agree that not only is the message of this quote great but also the way its put creates a huge impact.

I feel like a lot of people will disagree with this blog post because labelling someone as "evil" or "bad" is very common. This is just an inability to look further into the person and a fear too, however "nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood". If only we could attempt to understand people a little bit better, if only we had the patience and the courage then the world truly would be a better place. 

 In future, make sure you're not so quick to call someone evil or bad because people will call you those things throughout the course of your life and you know in yourself that you're not. Don't you? Well, what's the difference for other individuals? Its all just a case of levels. 

What do you think of this week's quote? Do you believe in evil?

Love,

Rachel=)

Body Image and Weight.

  

I would guess that the majority of the people reading this have an opinion on their weight. The way their body looks would mean a lot to them. I hope I'm wrong, but from experience I find that a person's weight and body is ridiculously over talked about. Nearly everyone has an opinion on their body shape and unfortunately most of the time this is a negative one.

I've mentioned it before and I'll mention it again, the media. Its totally messed up. I'm entirely convinced that 100%, yes 100% of this whole opinion that the skinny look is best is derived from this corrupt communication network. If teenage girls(they're the main people affected by poor body image) didn't constantly see skinny models everywhere they wouldn't possess the burning desire to achieve this body type which looks so glamorous and a bearer of happiness. Men too have super fit body builder, muscly body types to idolise and the whole thing is just super pressurising, depressing and dangerous.

“To all the girls that think you’re fat because you’re not a size zero, you’re the beautiful one, its society who’s ugly.” -Marilyn Monroe.

People can go to desperate measures to lose weight, and often they don't do it the 'correct way'. The way that takes a while to see results and doesn't alter your diet immediately so you can get skinny in a week. Out of desperation to reach this impossible goal people starve themselves and make themselves desperately weak, for what? That's an easy question for me to ask when I'm not currently in the mindset that these people are in. For some reason the craving to become very thin or to just change your body to look "perfect" is so strong and overpowering that people just can't let it go.  In some cases eating disorders develop.

If you told a caveman about eating disorders I highly doubt he'd ever be able to comprehend the concept. They would have seen food as its meant to be seen, as a means of surviving. At what point did it change in our eyes? Now people have huge emotional attachments to a thing which is just supposed to nourish the body. This Mr. Flintstone type character wouldn't be able to understand why someone wouldn't eat when they're hungry and had food available, and all in the name of image? He'd laugh in your face.

That is an ignorant response though. I think that the way some people treat eating disorders is terrible. "Why don't they just go eat a cheese burger?", "But they're skinny, why can't they see that?" Its not as simple as shoving cakes down their mouths. Its a psychological condition that should stir pity in the soul, not anger in the mind. Patience can be lost when there is a lack of understanding and I know that well, but these people don't want to live the way they are, its like they're puppets to the eating disorder and can't escape its clutches. People need to take a little more care when dealing with anorexics/ bulimics because they're not as fortunate to have your attitude towards food and your own body.

"Don't be defined by your size"

I believe that a lot of perfectionists and people who were heavy as children can be particularly susceptible to eating disorders. Another problem is that every woman's apparent desire to be super thin is pretty out in the open and accepted. On tumblr and other sites like it, you often see picture quotes reading "I need to get skinny" and 'thinspiration' is commonplace. The fact that most people don't react when a girl says she feels fat or is trying to lose weight is more fuel to the fire. Human Beings also have an aid to their weight worries, the weighing scales. Woohoo! They have numbers to obsess over. And then there's calories. It almost turns into a sickeningly pleasing activity for people to count calories and weighing themselves everyday, however it only leads to depression because you're almost always disappointed standing on the scales and when you find out there's like 400 cals in a brownie.

I believe in honesty. So although this is pretty hard for me to do I will admit that I suffered from a very mild eating disorder/ weight obsession a year ago. Very few people know because I feel embarrassed that I ever could have been so 'weak'. I don't even feel qualified to say I suffered from one because I didn't lose enough weight to be anorexic or whatever but in my mind it was very strong. I believe it was because I went through a perfectionist period and that I've always been an over thinker (think and then think some more;)). I was also overweight as a child and I was always told this, even though I was very young. I never thought I could reach a weight that other kids in my class had. Its a sad thought for a child to have. Anyway, It was a tough year for me. I constantly counted calories and wanted to lose more weight. It was my biggest insecurity and I know how hard it  feels to try and move on. I should have but I didn't receive professional help. However, it is the greatest achievement I have ever made to say that I dragged myself over the finish line of recovery. I can now say with 100% conviction that I have not one ounce of an eating disorder/ body issues in me. The reason I'm telling you this isn't to blow my trumpet, but to maybe try and help others suffering from the same thing.

It took a lot of repercussions and stumbling backwards before I made it out the other end but what helped me was letting go of the perfectionist values I possessed. I grew emotionally  and became happier and more confident in other areas and this lead me to move forward with the problem, I genuinely don't know what else worked for me. It was simply me working hard at being happy. Another reason I don't like people knowing is because I don't want them to judge me on that, it bears no resemblance to who I am today. I have grown so much since then and have absolutely no issue with my weight (I'm being honest). Maybe you think I was being too personal telling anyone who reads this that information but I'm not ashamed of who I am, my past included. You shouldn't feel ashamed or weak because you're struggling or have struggled. I want people to know that from first hand experience I can tell you that eating disorders are not driven by attention-seeking  or just generally being annoying. Its society, perfectionism, remarks and various other truly complicated triggers.

To address people who are just insecure about their body, whether it be to eating disorder level or 'stereotypical  teenage girl level' all I can say is to try and really follow all the quotes that you agree with in theory, like the Marilyn Monroe one above, but can't act on. Once again I ask you to incorporate logic into the situation because if you're insecure about your figure, whatever you see in the mirror is more than likely irrational. Also build up a high self esteem and positive thinking attitude in other areas and your body issues should heal. Its hard, but its so possible.

This is such an important issue to me that no matter how much I say I'll feel like I'm leaving something out.
Remember, no one thinks about your weight a fraction of how much you do. Happiness is so much more important than the gap between your thighs or a flat stomach, which if you'll bear in mind you only want because of what you've been told, what society tells you. Don't be society's generic puppet. You're so much more than that.

       How do you feel about your weight?

                                                                        Love,
                                                                             Rachel!=)

A gratitude blog.

    We are unbelievably lucky. You're wondering why I'm including you since I don't even know your circumstances? What your life consists of? I don't need to. I'm talking about how lucky we both are to be alive. We may have many other things to be thankful for or nothing else at all. Regardless we are living so that will be the base of our thanks.

 Why even be thankful for things in our life, accomplishments etc? If you are a pure atheist who doesn't believe in thanking God or a higher being , maybe you've questioned the purpose of this exercise. However its much more than that. Learning the art of gratitude enables you to benefit from the things you do have as opposed to the things you don't. It gives you a passion for life and motivates you . Essentially, it brings you happiness. So its not just a case of being submissive and worshipping an entity up there, its for yourself.

    Thus ladies and gentlemen, in this blog I am to going to write down the main things that I am grateful for  in the hopes of brightening my day and hopefully inspiring you to do the same!

Things I am grateful for....

1. My life. To be alive in this world. I don't know why I'm here or where I'm headed after but I'm alive now and that's great!

2. My mobility. A great fear I have is paralysis. It would be the worst thing that could happen to me and so I am so glad that I have the ability to move freely to wherever I want.

3.My Vision.  I have my sight to be able to see the beautiful things the world has to offer and witness incidents take place and all the big events in my life. Our ability to see is overlooked each and everyday. What would you do without your sight? Just imagine it, total darkness no matter what. You are so lucky to be able to read these words, see these colours. Take advantage of that and really see what's around you, take in the pigment of the colours and observe closely the different sights when you're on holiday or just in an unfamiliar place.

4. My hearing. I felt this needed to be in a seperate section to vision because they're both so important individually. Most of us have a passion for music don't we? Imagine not being able to listen to your favourite song or just feel the way only music can make you feel. Or even certain noises, people talking to you. I think we take all our senses for granted much too often, every day basically.

5. My health. My general health. To be able to get up every morning with no pain or difficulty. To have no physical setbacks, its a blessing. I really should use this revelation to exercise more...

"The essence of all beautiful art, all great art, is gratitude.

Friedrich Nietzsche"

6. The people in my life. My family and friends who surround me. I always have someone to turn to and people to share jokes with, big events and everything really. Connecting with people and being able to share their emotions is kind of beautiful when you think about it. Not everyone is so lucky to have people in their lives with whom they have benefiting relationships.

7. My connection with myself. I've always been someone who is well connected with themselves. I check in with myself a lot to (no matter how cliche it sounds) ensure that I'm happy and following my honest convictions.  Some people aren't as fortunate. So many lose themselves by getting caught up in life and they live day by day without being completely honest with themselves.

8. My Opportunites and Circumstances: I don't know if everyone reading this is so fortunate but I feel so grateful that I am in a peaceful country, which is not at war or enduring a terrible crisis at the moment. I live in a first world country, which may be in a recession, but there are still so many opportunities out there for me. I'm also so grateful for everything I own, there are so many people out there with terrible circumstances in their lives but when you don't encounter them everyday you can forget how lucky you are. Also, we live in a modern age! We have amazing technology at our fingertips and there are so many more rights for women, gays and blacks than there were years ago. Its a great time to live in.

9. My talents. I may not be the best at everything I want to be and since I use to be a perfectionist this fact led me to forget about the things I was good at. We are all good at something and we should value those things! I believe we all have a purpose in the world and no matter what you will fulfill that purpose. Your talents contribute to your purpose which is exciting. So act on them even if you just have one and that one talent is polishing shoes or making buttons. Still counts.

10. My Imagination and dreams . Without them we'd all be pretty boring. Wouldn't we?

I feel like because life is so vast that I'm definately leaving something out or in ten minutes I'll think of something that really should have made my top ten and because it didn't it'll just vanish or something. ;)Despite this, here are my top ten things that I am grateful for in my life. The headings probably aren't that different to yours but the content sure is! I hope you can take the time now to ponder on what you're most grateful for in your life. Trust me it'll lift you out of a bad mood in an instant!

    Of course the question is, 
                                              What are you most grateful for?

                                                                                         Love,
                                                                                               Rachel=)

Makeup VS Intelligence?

I'm telling you, there's brain power required in putting on mascara...

It has come to my attention recently that a debate took place where the motion lay that "Women who wear makeup are less intelligent than women who don't". It struck me as a very interesting argument and so I thought I'd share my opinion. Male readers, don't fret if you feel like this post does not apply to you. You're opinion on this is equally valuable!

Firstly I would like to re define the sentence.

1. I don't think it should be limited to just women's intelligence. It is becoming much more popular for guys to wear makeup too.

2. I'm going to investigate what they mean by intelligence. I mean, it such a broad word, isn't it?

3. I'm also going to look at the fact that the declaration does not go into why a person might be wearing the makeup.

So, lets begin!

The main issue I have with the accusation is that you don't know why the person is wearing makeup. We don't all wear it for the same reason, to impress people. Some of us like to wear it because its a collection obsession, just like match cards and stamps, there is so much makeup that it genuinely becomes a hobby to collect it. As well as this, I know that I'm obsessed with colours, and makeup is all about that. There are thousands of different lipstick, blush and eye shadow shades to have fun with. And that's just it, Makeup is an art. Its  a method of expression and creativity only on our faces instead of a paper canvas.However I am well aware that people have taken to wearing makeup for insecurity reasons. Many don't feel pretty without it on and may not even leave the house barefaced! This is where the claim can be justified.

What is intelligence? I think most people agree that there is not only one type. Yes, if you're a student you're encircled by the thought that "book smart" intelligence is the only one and I think in this world we live in, Knowledge as an intelligence is ranked far too highly. Its a type of intelligence to know loads of stuff whether it be the names of presidents, the location of different countries or tonnes of historical facts, however it is not the be all and end all. There are many other types. Sensitivity is a type of intelligence, I count that as being able to feel the emotions of other individuals easily. There's an intelligence in being able to come up with ideas and engage in deep thoughts and think philosophically. Common sense is intelligence (one which I possess little of, I was packing ingredients for a dish to be made in school once, the recipe required salt so I brought in the whole bottle. I mean it didn't give me a measurement...?)

And there are various others which I have not mentioned. Intelligence is a very complex matter which is simplified much too often to the point where it has lost its detail. There is one type of intelligence, however, that I have not mentioned. I believe it is an intelligence to look past the images you see in magazines and on billboards of super glamorous models, and see instead a fake idealism, photo shop and a corrupt business.

To be able to hold your own and stand your ground. To be so connected with yourself that you can't be fooled,even slightly by the media, into changing yourself. That is an intelligence. And so going back to what I said earlier about many wearing make up to cover insecurities, I think this is the only justification that people who wear makeup are less intelligent. They have become sucked into the media and have lost the art of questioning it. That is an intelligence lost. But it is one type, and one type alone.

Overall, I completely disagree with the statement. To me, even the idea that wearing make up affected other types of intelligence is ridiculous. The action of putting lipstick on will not cause you to forget your history dates or drop 10 IQ points. I feel that where most people debating this are coming from is from a very stereotypical place. However stereotypes do not belong in the world of truth so saying that every one who wears make up is a barbie doll is false. I love make up because its so fun to mess around with and everyone has their different reasons for wearing it. Don't judge a book by its cover!

What do you think? Do you think people who wear makeup are less intelligent than those who don't?

Love,

Rachel!=)

Allergies: Anaphylaxis

       I am bringing to you today a very important topic which I have learned is very much overlooked and generally misunderstood in most of our fortunate lives. Do you have an allergy? Most of you probably do. Whether it be pollen, dust, the hoover? Many people in society manage their everyday lives with ease if they have such allergies because they're not major. Now let me put this to you. Imagine if you had anaphylaxis. What's anaphylaxis you ask? That question is the problem. That question is the reason my Transition year class have undergone a YSI project to raise awareness about this subject. I realise you remain yearning for an answer. Allow me to explain.....
        Anaphylaxis, by definition, is an extreme, often life-threatening, allergic reaction to an antigen (e.g. a bee sting) to which the body has become hypersensitive. Doesn't it sound frightening? Ordinary things in life like nuts, eggs or milk, which most people consume without even realizing it through chocolate bars, meals out etc. However for someone suffering from anaphylaxis, life isn't so simple. They must avoid these triggers or they will have a serious reaction in the form of a shock. The triggered sufferer will begin swelling, develloping hives, lowered blood pressure and dilated blood vessels. If an anaphylactic shock is not treated immediately it can be fatal. What's terrible is that some severe sufferers don't even have to consume the food which they are allergic to, sometimes it is enough for them to smell it and a reaction will ensue.
       So as you can see, its a very serious issue which many people are ignorant of. Now let me guide you to another few thoughts. Picture a young sufferer of anaphylaxis having fallen head over heels in love and the big moment, the first kiss is about to take place. Fireworks are ready to pop, candles alight and the stars have shifted into alignment. What could go wrong? Well anaphylactics cannot have their kiss without checking that their partner has not eaten the food they are allergic to within a certain time frame. Complicates matter, doesn't it? Now lets envision the whole family going out for a nice meal at the local restaurant. Unfortunately, because of the fact that many restaurants do not cater for allergies, the sufferer will find it incredibly hard to eat there. Even if restaurants do serve allergy-friendly meals they do not guarantee absolutely no cross-contamination. Obviously these are just two common examples of the difficulties severe allergy sufferers face in their day to day lives. What everyone reading this needs to realise is that this condition seriously impacts on the lives of those affected!
          And now for a few stats:
- In the USA, Anaphylaxis cause the deaths of between 500- 1000 people each year
- The frequency of anaphylaxis is increasing
- Anaphylaxis occurs in all age groups.
- The most common fool allergies are 1. Peanuts 2. Milk 3. Shellfish
       I'm sure anyone who lives with anaphylaxis everyday by being a sufferer or close relative will read and think it a very brief synopsis however my aim was not to overwhelm you but to introduce the idea that Allergies are serious and not just confined to a sneeze in the middle of summer. My groups' project "Strategies4Allergies" predominantly aims to raise awareness for this good cause and to ultimately improve the lives of allergy sufferers in our community. I hope after reading this, ye guys will think more about underlying issues in society and if ye see collections for Anaphylaxis please give what you can! Your money is certainly going to good use:). If you're Irish why not check out www.anaphylaxisireland.ie, there you can learn a lot more detailed information. They also have a facebook page and a twitter so connect away!
                                                                      Love,
                                                                         Rachel!=)

Sluts and Whores

Slut?

   

     Sluts and Whores. Terms we use to describe women who sleep around and wear "too little" clothing. And the funny thing is that 90% of the people using either word are women. I've used it myself, when I was younger. I mean I'm definitely not a candidate for the slut group, a convent some may say, but provocative is certainly not a word you'd use to describe me. All the same though I think its a word that should be eradicated from alls' vocabulary for many reasons.
    The first being the fact that it is none of your business how a woman chooses to dress. If you are worried about how women are being made into sex objects and used then it still doesn't make sense to start calling them names and blaming them. If you're a woman, just because you do not wish to dress provocatively does not give you the right to call other females out for doing so. Often its a jealousy thing, other women become envious of the way these so called "whores" get huge amounts of attention from men. I don't know what your jealous of? You're jealous of being looked upon as a sex object, only from the chest down? Why would you desire that type of attention, those type of men? And if you're a man, you don't own your girlfriend/wife/ any woman. You cannot dictate how they dress or what they do. Its not like the old days where women were ye're puppets. Women are independent and have so many more rights now. They have their own style and beliefs. As we always did, in case you didn't know;)
    Also, and a very important reason, is that there is no male equivalent of the term "slut" and that's definitely not because men are straight laced and faithful. If a guy sleeps with a load of women its looked highly upon in his circle of friends, he's the boss and is pushed up a notch. If a girl sleeps around however she gets called these derogatory names by her peers and no one tries to look further into why she did it. Or just simply leave her to a  judgement free life. Where is ye're justification in that? Its highly sexist and unfair.
     As well as this, many women feel it is a type of feminism to show off the female body. They don't necessarily do it to impress men. I agree that it is more feministic to dress femininely (or provocatively as some do) than to dress like a man because we should be able to prove that we're equal to them while wearing high heels and lipstick. Why try and become like them? With this being said, it is essential for all women to feel free after years of oppression. They can wear and do what they wish just like men can.
    I've always emphasised though that women shouldn't feel the need to be sexy and promiscuous. So many girls do feel that they have to wear so little clothing when they go out to impress men and I believe this pressure is wrong. We are not mere objects and we deserve so much more than to be thought of as that. And just remember, if you think you're special because some guys staring at your chest in a really low top? He's done that and will do that to any woman he meets. Millions of women have 'amazing' bodies.
     To conclude, I think we females especially need to quit using these horrible words towards our fellow girls. We should be so proud on how far women have come to be able to dress and do what they like and even if you know they're just acting this way to impress men then pity them, don't become angry with them! Its hardly their fault that society's voice for the male species has made them insecure now is it? Show a bit of mercy because you may one day feel that too. I vow never to use the word "slut" or "whore" again because neither word tells the story or  the reasoning behind the girl standing in front of me.
   
         Do you know what's sad? I couldn't find an anti-slut quote to end this post with. Shows something....

                                                    Do you believe in promiscuity?
                   
                                                                                   Love,
                                                                                      Rachel=)